Your heart skipped when you saw the double lines on the pregnancy test you took, and right away you started to imagine that baby in your life. Every time you heard a name you liked spoken in passing, you would file it away on your list of potential baby names. You told people you were expecting, you had mentally or physically rearranged your house to accommodate a nursery, and maybe even picked up a few things for the baby. You would lay your hand on your belly protectively and felt a mother’s love.
When you lost the pregnancy, you lost someone who had become real to you, someone you already loved and were looking forward to welcoming into your family. You see pregnant women and mothers with their children and your stomach churns with jealousy and longing. Maybe this wasn’t your first miscarriage either, maybe it is the latest of many and you feel like you are the only one who is going through this. You feel betrayed by your body, and that is affecting how you feel about sex with your partner.
The platitudes and hurtful comments keep coming at you like daggers, and you feel like you will scream if you hear one more time “you can try again”, “it happens all the time”, or “once you stop trying it will happen”. Nobody seems to understand how much you are grieving, maybe not even your partner.
Counseling after a miscarriage will be a nonjudgmental place where you can find acceptance as you express the pain of this loss and work through how this is affecting you, your relationships, and other areas of your life. Together we can work out strategies for how to respond when people are hurtful or dismissive, and to integrate this loss into how you choose to move forward from it. There is no need to suffer this loss alone, having the support of a counselor during this time helps you to heal.
CONTACT ME to schedule a free 30-minute introductory session to learn more about how counseling can help you recover from the pain of miscarriage.